now change dayah !

kite msti percaye kpd ketentuan ..

tetapi tidak semesti nyew ape yg kite nak kite boleh dpt ..

walaupun niat kite ikhlas ,, walaupun kite usahe sedaye upaye mncapai ape yg kite inginkan ..

walau seribu doa dipanjatkan ..

tao tak npew ?

kerane mungkin ape yg kite ingin kan itu sememang nyew telah ditentukan n tak mungkin jadi hak kite .. mngkin kalau kite milike akan lebih mendatangkan keburukan drpd kebaikan ..

kite harus yakin ape jua yg dtg dari allah apsti ade hikmah nyew ..

manusie cllu mengeluh dgn dugaan yg dihadapi tnpe menyedari segale dugaan itu diberikan utk menjadi kan manusie lbih bergune ..

perlu diingat ,, allah tak uji makhluk Nya dgn ujian2 yg tak sesuai dgn kekuatan diri makhluk yg ingin diuji ..

hidup seharus nye dijalani dgn rase yakin ,, nak atau tak nak ,, dugaan pasti dtg sbb tu sememang nyew dah ditentu kan allah yg nak uji kekuatan makhluk nyew ..

walaupun sejauh ane kite mngembare belum tentu kite dpt ape yg kite cari ..

yg penting ade larr HATI ..

and bak kate owg puteh kan if u luv somebody  without any reasons ,, u will accept him for what he is ,, not for what u want him to be ..

and bile kite putus cinte juz anngap kite berpisah dgn owg yg tak sesuai dgn kite ..

juz let him go ..

BE HAPPY !

even susah nak terime knyataan tapi aQ still mcm syg at die ..

g jalan dlm kampus nie mmg tercarik2 die ..

every single thing will remind me bout him ..

gile kan !

but i want him to noe that he touch my heart in a way that no one else did before ..

thinking bout old memories

today ase pnt cgt ..
npew eh aQ nie pemalas cgt ?
yg aQ tak than tu mase jwb test math hari tu aQ bleh rase mls nak jwb ?
u suck dayah !!
teruk seyh perangai aQ ..
tah ape2 ..
mb coz tak jmpew mysterious guy ..
ek eleh nak gak ko salah kan budak tu ..
tak ade kne mngena kot..
ko jew acting lbeh ..
final dah dekat tapi dgn slmbe ney aQ bace novel larr dgr mp3 larr n ciap boleh tidur bnyk lagi tu ..
ish3 ...
one more mb aQ sedih bile pkr family aQ kowt ..
ibu aQ pown da kawen lain n dah ade anak pown ..
so secare automatically nye aQ ade adk tiri ..
omg ...
u dun noe how much i hate that word ..
ADIK TIRI !
n aQ tak baik dgn ibu coz ade gaduh tapi aQ tak ingt ape punce nye ..
da bnyk kali gaduh so mmg tak ungt ape punce larr ..
but keinsafan dtg n rase nak mntak maaf sblum exam ..
yew larr mati aQ klo tak lulus ..
dah bnyk pulak duit diowg dah habis utk aQ so kne study hard n forget the mysterious guy ..

song for eu

Takkan pernah habis air mataku
Bila ku ingat tentang dirimu
Mungkin hanya kau yang tahu
Mengapa sampai saat ini ku masih sendiri

Adakah disana kau rindu padaku
Meski kita kini ada di dunia berbeda
Bila masih mungkin waktu berputar
Kan kutunggu dirimu …

Biarlah ku simpan sampai nanti aku kan ada di sana
Tenanglah diriku dalam kedamaian
Ingatlah cintaku kau tak terlihat lagi
Namun cintamu abadi …

song dat show how much i miz eu ..

i noe dat u r the popular guy in our campus but so stupid coz im falling in luv wif u ..

SO STUPID !

now i promise wif myself n my family i wont let u makes me falling in luv wif u again ..

now u cant hurt me ..

i will not trust or falling in luv again ..

its so hurt ....

its hurting me damn much ..

u dun noe how i feel n i wont let u noe ..

WONT LET U NOE N WONT LET U HURT MY FEELING AGAIN ..

n now i will 4get u ..

aQ akn buang kao terus dlm idop aQ ..

thankz makes me happy lately n thankz 4 bring me back in my sad worlds ..

thank you so much u freaking hot guy ....

see u again

malam semalam aQ g makan at satu tmpat tu kan ..
mase sblum aQ g tmpat mkan tu aQ g mane2 pown mesti aQ akan crik dat guy ..
mmg sedih coz tak jmpe langsung bayang dye ..
so back to story yg aQ g tmpat makan tu ..
mase g tu mmg tercarik2 larr bayang dye kan tapi tak jmpew so da give up larr kan ..
aQ consider dye balek kg ..
so tyme nal balek tu ade larr sekumpulan budak2 lelaki ..
takkan larr aQ nak pndg mke diowg sume so aQ pndg bwh jew larr ..
ttbe ade orang panggil nme aQ so aQ pown pndg belakang coz ingat kan budak kelas aQ ..
mmg aQ taw tu bukan suare budak kelas aQ tp pndg jew larr ...
nak taw gerangan umat yg ttbe pnggl nme aQ ..
guess what ?
ble pusing belakang jew budak tu pown senyum at aQ ..
AHA my sweetheart !
omg im so happy !!
finally i can see his sweet smile !
aQ tak bley nak ckp ape2 melain kan EH !
sengal kan ..
ptt nye tanye larr dye nak g mane ke dah makan ke ?
nie ckp EH jew ..
aduyai dayah !!
syg nyew ........
tapi tak ape larr ..
asal kan aQ dpt jmpe dye ..
tak penting larr kan ape aQ  ckp ..
drpd aQ ckp bende2 bdo ...
baik aQ diam kan ..
n smlm gak aQ lukis nme dye at tangan n belakang aQ ..
nie semua hasil karya my baby ezra yg berjaye melukis tgn aQ ..
mmg cntik ..
pic akan di upload secepat mungkin ..
but not today ..
esok ade exam koko so kne ulangkaji larr ..
motif larr kan ..
walaupun aQ tak semangat sgt nak study tapi aQ cbe demi family aQ kwn2 aQ n a**** ..
haiz ble larr aQ dpt duduk sebelah dye n brbual dgn mesra gelak2 bagai dgn dye ..
hadoi !
so hari nie pown tak jmpew gak ..
geram larr ..
dah larr dye tak on9 ..
adu cmne je eh aQ nak knl dgn dye ..
ckp pown jarang ..
alahye sweetheart !
apsal ssh sgt nak jmpe or ckp nie ?
hopely dye pown ad same feeling at aQ ..
haha even aQ tak hot mcm dye ..
plz larr bg aQ jmpe dye ...
bg aQ ckp dgn dye ..
bg dye syg aQ as kapel dgn sepenuh hati dye ..
ily a***** !!!!!!!!!!

miss dat mysterious guy

today i didnt see his face neither his sweet smile ...

haiz ............

1 kampus aQ crik p ta jmpew ...

balek kew ?

adu da gelabah abez awi nie ..

sume ta kne ..

ecok ad test ..

adu ag jem ..

klo tgk mkew dye baru semangat ckt ..

urm i've been thinking dis whole dat ?

is he a gud guy 4 me ?

i wanna noe more bout him ..

oke i find out bout it later but now i want to noe if he will accept me as who i am ?

im not a perfect girl ..

im juz ordinary girl ..

he deserve to get better than me ..

i luv him so much ..

hahaha ..

gotta go chat wif my silat frends ...

paintful

smlm g 1 tmpt uw then saw him ...
so sad coz when i saw his facei gotta a feeling dat i wont get him ..
i wont be his n he wont be myne ..
its so sad ..
i really want to be wif him ..
he the only one dat i can be wif ...
he's the one i can luv wif all of my heart ..
i dun noe y but everytyme i look into his eyes i feel so calm n peaceful ..
the same feeling when im wif syafik ...
i dun think dat he would feel the same way lyke me .,.
he's a gud looking n kind ...
things dat makes me fall into him is  his smile ..
i juz luv it !
omg i wish u will hv the same feeling lyke me ..
aQ tak harap kan ape2 utk dye bg at aQ ..
aQ juz nak dye bhgie kn aQ n buat aQ bhgie mcm dlu ...
ketawe n senyum mcm dlu ...
aQ pnt ngs n pnt tersekse ..
pnt cgt2 ..
klo larr idop aQ bhgie ...............................
npew owg len bley bhgie tapi bkn aQ ?
kwn2 aQ cllu ckp blum smpai mase nye tapi da 2 taun aQ tersekse n cmpai ble aQ nak tnggu lagi ..
sakit sgt bile nmpk gmbar tu ...
sakit cgt2 ..
syg tak sape dpt rase ape yg aQ rase ...
cukup 1 aQ  dikecewekan n cukup larr 1 aQ dhine ..
rase nye tak pyh larr aQ  nak bg harapan at dye coz aQ tau yg aQ tak kan dpt dye ..
sakit kan ble tak dpt ape yg kite nak cgt2 utk kbaikan diri kite ..
god plz give me one chance to make me happy again ...
plz give me dat chance ...
n i promise will be wif him faithfully n always be by his side no matter what ...
give me his love so dat i can be happy again .. 

broken heart again

today i went to library to print my slip examination ..

guess what ?

aQ jmpew dye larrr ...

mlew2 da malu+excited tapi tetibe rase sedih cgt2 coz nmpk dye dgn girl lain ...

aQ da nak ngs at ctu p still hold on my tears coz tak kan larr nak ngs at library tu ...

malu larr student len nmpk ..

but bile pikir2 balek mmg tak patut kowt aQ suke kat dye coz dye popular n aQ tak ...

dye join dat show sdg kan aQ juz student biase yg tak hot pown ..

dulu mase mule2 kenal dye aQ ingat kn yg dye tu juz student biase n tak popular mcm aQ but aQ salah ..

dye idaman setiap girls dlm kampus nie aQ rase ..

mse mds pown aQ tak perasan dye ..

sedih gile kowt coz aQ tak nak owg yg mcm dye ..

too popular ..

but badly aQ dah fall in luv wif him ..

bkn sng taw aQ nak suke n terime owg tu ..

tapi bile da suke tu mmg suke n syg betul2 ..

but dye too popular cmpai kn aQ taw aQ tak kan dpt dye ..

sejak kali pertame pndg senyuman dye kat tmpt latihan aQ cm terus jatuh ...

jatuh pew ?

jatuh tangge ..

haha tak dew larr ..

opkos jatuh cinte ....

but seriously aQ tak expect yg dye tu popular ...

dlu sblm dye join show tu maybe dye ad ckt perasaan utk aQ tapi lps show tu maybe dye dah sedar yg ramai girls lagi bgs n cantek dari aQ so pas nie dye tak kan pndg aQ pown lagi ..

he deserve to get a better girls than me eventhough deep in my heart i need him so damn much !

yea but i have to back in reality dat im not dat freaking hot to atrack his heart ..

so im back in my sad world ..

crying without any reasons and still keeping the old sad  memories ...

omg i  wish u noe how deep my luv 4 u ...

haha mmg jiwang siak !

klo pkr2 balek pown mmg bnyk kowt rintangan klo aQ kapel dgn dye ..

msti secret admires dye dlu cm tak puas hati dgn aQ n maybe diowg akan buat 1000 helah utk sakit kan hati aQ ..

aQ nie dah larr cpt down so klo diowg jeling ckt pown aQ msti start tak selesa kn ..

one more aQ tak tao cmnew nak explain bout my family ..

msti larr parents dye nak tao dgn sape anak dye berkawan n family aQ cmne ?

so cmne aQ nak explain sedang kan aQ pown tak tao nak ckp cmne ?

most important thing is i dun noe who i am ?

where i come from ?

whose my parents ?

so things will be complicated n aQ tkowt dye tak dpt terime aQ seadanye ..

deep in my heart im so sick wif all dis things ?

love n family ...

im been suffer for a long tyme ...

i dun noe what to do n i think no one is meant tome ?

i will be single till im dead ..

live alone n always in sadness ...

and die wif sadness ......................

going to mbmb

start now enough bout syafik ...

today im going to mbmb wif my frens such as azwan,,tokei..haikal n cot ..

things dat makes me shock was i meet someone that i lyke to see his smile ..

i didnt expect dat i will meet him !

i juz love to see his smile ..

u make me fall into u ..

haha omg !!

then im going to malacca mall n jusco wif my frens ...

then went to communications fiesta ..

once again dat boy dat stole my heart AGAIN makes me shock !!

i saw him at ***** ...

omg he's so cute !

i have to admit dat i love him n cant lose him in dis tyme ..

am i falling in luv ??

am i nur hidayah,,a girl dat hard to believe in man n love suddenly love a guy ?

is it me ?

im not sure if he love me too ..

omg i luv u so much a**** ...

i luv to see ur smile ..

without any doubt i have to say i afraid to lose u ..

i cant lose u .....

im just hopping dat he will be mine ...

coz im not dat kinda girl dat easy to lyke people n love guy ..

he's the only one dat succesfully stole my heart ...

a*** would u be mine ?

haha

about mohd syafik bin bahamad

cite nie bermule ble aQ n wani baru abez tusyen mase ktwg still in form 3 ..
tibe2 boboy n syafik dtg at aQ n wani ajak ktwg g mkn coz boboy mase tu minat at wani ..
aQ konpem2 larr kne ikowt kn ...
lepas makan diown ajak g karaoke ..
mase tu aQ dah mule suke at syafik  sebab die pown da tnjuk yg die pown suke at aQ ..
mase nak balek die mntak nombor phone aQ n aQ terus bg ..
lepas seminggu kenal ktwg terus kapel ..
tapi die tak serius sebab bg die bile die dah dapat cukup larr ...
lepas sebulan clash n tyme tu mmg aQ frust cgt2 coz tu larr first tyme aQ fall in luv ..
alasan die mntak putus mmg tak munasabah n die mntak aQ jadik adik angkat die ...
tak logik kn !
so aQ pown time jew larr .....
tibe2 one day die contact aQ semule ...
hati aQ happy sgt2 ..
aQ cakap yg aQ dedicated lgu hate that i love eu by neyo n rihana at die ...
die pown tanye aQ still syg die lagi tak ?
aQ jawab larr ye syg cgt2 ...
then ktwg terus kapel semule ..
malang nye lepas 2 bulan kapel ktwg putus lagi ..
sedih nye tak payah ckp larr kn ...
mmg aQ ngs jew ....
aQ ad diary yg aQ tls segale2 psl die ...
aQ pkr na lupe kn die so aQ bg diary tu kat adik syafik utk die smpan ..
satu hari tu adik die bwk diary tu kat luar coz die nak bace ...
tibe2 mak die sruh g kedai n die trtinggal bku tu kat luar ...
n tibe2 lak syafik ternampak buku tu n bace sume isi kndungan buku tu ..
n konon nye pulak die rase bersalah coz buat aQ suffering then die terus call aQ n mntak maaf ..
die ckp die menyesal n jnji akan jage aQ betul2 klo aQ bg die peluang utk treime die balek ..
aQ yg mmg syg die cgt2 opkos larr aQ terime even kwn2 aQ tak suke at die ..
then kejadian yg same jadi lagi ...
lepas aQ kapel 6 bulan dgn die n dah rapat dgn family die,,sekali lagi die buat hal mntak putus dgn aQ ..
aQ mmg dah frust abez n so tiap hari aQ ngs n ngs cmpai aQ tak study n tak terurus idop ..
start drpd tu larr bermule larr kehidupan yg sgt perit n sakit ...
sekarang lepas 2 tahun aQ pts aQ still tak dapat lupe kan die ..
die pulak keep insulting me n hurting me without any strong reasons ..
n i cant luv any boy untill today ..
dun noe why but i want a guy that can make my heart fall into him ...